A Story Written by a Seven-Year-Old

by Hanna Vock

When I was still working in kindergarten, a girl who was now in Grade 2 gave me the following story, which I find not only well written, but also demonstrates a fine sense of humour.

Here again in typed form, for easier reading (and below that the translation into English and the comments of the author):

Ich wohnte in einer sehr gepflegten Wohnung mit einem Mann zusammen. Er verwöhnte mich sehr. Doch eines Tages erschrak ich, denn ich hörte mein Herrchen zu seinem Freund sagen: „Ich will den alten Dackel verkaufen!“ Aber immerhin sagte er: „Für 3000 Mark.“ Ich war also doch noch etwas wert
Der Freund sagte darauf: Du bist wohl verrückt! 3000 Mark bekommst du nie für einen Dackel!“
Lange Zeit hörte ich nichts mehr von dem Thema. Doch ungefähr nach 3 Wochen sah ich, wie mein Herrchen einen Zettel schrieb. Darauf stand:
Junger, munterer Dackel für 3000 Mark zu verkaufen!

Weiter konnte ich nichts lesen, weil er mich aus dem Zimmer brachte. Diesen Zettel wollte er wahrscheinlich am Supermarkt aufhängen.

Nach 2 Tagen kam der erste Bewerber. Mein Herrchen fragte zuerst nach dem Geld. Der Bewerber sagte: „Ich habe es nicht in bar, aber ich habe zwei Hühner im Wert von je 1500 Mark dabei.“

Mein Herrchen ging doch tatsächlich auf den Vorschlag ein zu tauschen. Ich war empört!

English version:
I lived in a very neat flat with a man. He spoiled me very much.
(Here, I’m sure many readers think the narrator is a woman, and one wonders how the seven-year-old gets such ideas…. Maybe it was even intentional to mislead the reader).

But one day I was startled, for I heard my master say to his friend, „I want to sell the old dachshund!“
(Now it becomes clear who is telling the story…)

But at least he said, „For 3,000 marks.“ So I was worth something after all.

(Here we witness an old dachshund trying to console himself).

The friend said: „You must be crazy! You’ll never get 3000 marks for a dachshund!“
For a long time I heard nothing more about the subject.

But about 3 weeks later I saw my master writing a note. It said:
„Young, lively dachshund for sale for 3000 marks!“

(How businesslike! The old dachshund is advertised as young and lively, which suggests that the seven-year-old author has some critical knowledge of the world).

I couldn’t read anything else because he took me out of the room. He probably wanted to post this note at the supermarket.

(The story develops and stays consistent with the dachshund’s thoughts…)

After 2 days the first applicant came. My master first asked for the money. The applicant said, „I don’t have it in cash, but I have two chickens worth 1500 marks each with me.“

(A surprising, funny turn of events…)

My master actually went along with the suggestion to swap. I was outraged!

(The story was told consistently from the dachshund’s point of view right to the end and was well to the point. Amazing!)